Top 5 Ways I Warped My Little Brother

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On with the show this is it!

My brother and I are 2 years apart, me being the oldest…wisest…smartest…the list goes on.

Here are the top 5 things I did to warp him. Not that he needed any help from me, but, I’d like to say I contributed something in his life. (My older sister helped with #5.) 

So without further ado…

5. Ignored him and called it “shining.” He would holler, “Mom, Jessica and Celeste are shining on me.” Since my mom had no idea what that was, we never got in trouble. Most nights he went to bed crying. Yeah, yeah, boo hoo.

4. When Mom and Dad were gone, I’d throw steak knives at his door so he wouldn’t come out. He still tells on me for that, twenty years later. I like to call that, overkill.

3. Left him in the road half dead when our psycho Doberman ran out in front of him on his bike. He flipped head over the handle bars. I was too busy laughing hysterically in the yard with the neighbor. He survived. Barely. He had a concussion. I might’ve peed a little.

2. To get out of washing dishes, because the psycho Doberman ate the dishwasher, no it did, I would holler, cry, and yell at  him, (he was drying) to stop hitting me. My mom would scream, “Jared! Knock it off!” He would plead, “I’m not doing it! She’s lying.” Why would I make that up? 😉 And then, my dad would make him wash and dry. Alone.  I could only get away with this about once a week to keep it believable.

And the #1 way I warped my brother…

1. I dressed him up in Holly Hobby nightgowns, painted his nails, and made him have tea parties. We have pictures as proof.

Love you, Bro! No, really. I do.

What mean things did you do to your sibling/s? Have a great weekend!

Oh yeah, if you haven’t visited Living by Grace–an online devotional community–please click here and join in! (or click the “like” in the sidebar)

AND… I have some BIG BIG BIG news! Coming Soon!

17 thoughts on “Top 5 Ways I Warped My Little Brother

  1. Oh my!!! I hope he got some revenge for the Holly Hobby thing!

    I used to run away from my little brother (3 yrs younger) when he was a toddler yelling "stink-pot!"

    Also put him in a swivel chair and spun him around until he puked. A lot.

    I was also known to steal the tv remote from him on a fairly regular basis.

    And he still loves me. 😀

    Can't wait to hear your BIG BIG BIG news!!!

  2. Can't wait to hear the BIG BIG news!
    Fun post!

    I was the baby of the family so my brothers warped me…

    I always got my revenge. When they would go out on dates, just as they were slipping into their dress shoes…ah whipped cream.

    Another favorite was throwing a box of dog wormer in the backseat before they left. Try to explain that one to a new date.

    My one brother played basketball. One time I took a regular marker and went over where he had our last name on the ball in permanent ink. Well, when he returned from playing at the nearby courts…everyone had our name on them…backwards! Such great memories. te he he

    Love being the little sister.

  3. Why is it always little brothers that seemed to get it the worst? 🙂 My brother is 7 years younger and one time when he was about 11, I threw an entire bag of Hershey's Miniatures all over the living room and then screamed for my mom and told her that he did it–just to see his giant, innocent eyes as he took a verbal reaming for it. Ha. Yep, I think all big sisters have a mean-streak.

    My sister (2 yrs my junior) used to take the seat cushion out of the chair and put my brother there (he was maybe 3), replace the cushion and then play "turkey in the oven." He wasn't allowed to get out until he popped his arm up to show that he was fully "cooked."

    Poor, poor boy. We recently shared these stories and more at the rehearsal dinner at his wedding. 🙂

  4. Throwing steak knives, wow. That's a little harsh, don't ya think? lol.

    My sister (7yrs younger than me) gets mad simply because all of her friends like to hang out with me more than her. Who can blame them? 😉 lol

  5. I am oh so glad to be an only child!

  6. Oh the stories my sister and I could tell about each other. We were 18 mos apart and hardly ever got along.

    Her favorite story to make me look bad is when we were 6 and 4 (ish). I convinced her the tomato wire was a Chinese fighting cage (hey, I was 6). She let me put her in it, and then she got stuck.

    I hollared for mom and dad, someone said "just a minute", but what 4 or 6 yr old understands that?

    I grabbed her fingers where they were sticking out from the cage and told her to hop outside to dad (we were in the garage). She took a few hops, slipped on the slick floor, and fell face first into the ground.

    She couldn't catch herself because her arms were pinned to herside. She ended up with two black eyes, a goose egg the size of China, and a minor concussion.

    Hey, she didn't have to listen to me. hehehe…

  7. It's so nice to feel connected through torture, everyone! LOL

    I am loving these stories and cracking up!

    Have a great weekend! And call your siblings! 🙂

  8. I'm SO glad I learned this about you now 😉 And I thought you were a NICE girl! 😛

    I was WAY too nice to my siblings – though when my baby brother was born, I cried (and I told him about it several times when he got on my nerves). Can you blame me? He was my FOURTH brother – and no sisters!

    Though maybe I'm forgetting. Maybe I should ask my brothers (ummm – or not!)

  9. Loving the sound of BIG news!

    I'm the baby in the family. I remember yelling, "I'm never talking to you again," and 15 minutes later begging my sister to talk to me. I might have even paid her! Ah, siblings!

  10. How come I'm feeling a wee bit sorry for your brother….?

    LOL!! Very funny post! I laughed through it all. 😛

    Also, I just want to let you know that you won the lovely blog award over on LoaW. Follow the link to find out how to claim it!

  11. Good heavens, you are one sadistic sister!!
    I was never one for playing pranks or being mean to my little brothers. They, on the other hand, have played lots of very mean and funny tricks on me. 🙂
    I was the "perfect" child in the fam, don't ya know?
    Seriously, though, I was usually a pretty good girl.

  12. This cracks me up! I totally get this because I was the oldest and super mean to my sister.
    -I told her teenagers started at 10 (when I turned 10, but at 13 when she turned 10).
    -I told her my Christmas gifts were just for me, but hers were to share.
    -I told her I knew Hawaiian and would talk jibberish around her until she cried

    etc. etc. etc. We were so mean!

  13. It's always the sisters who do the meanness. My little sister (4 yr younger) was forever bedeviling my little brother (6 yr younger) and then blaming me for whatever he'd done. Mother & Dad caught on after 10 or 12 years, though.

  14. Honestly, this made me laugh. I'm the youngest of two, and my brother is 12 years older than me – so besides my birth "ruining" his life, I didn't really pull fast ones on him. I did, however, treat my younger cousin like she was the baby sister I never had. Oh, she'd do anything I said, and man did it get her in trouble! Once, I told her to climb my grandfather's radio tower and she did. Only problem, she was too scared to come down. My dad had to crawl up after her and my grandmother gave her a big whoopin' when she was safe inside the house. I remember her staring at me through her long bangs and tear filled eyes, and I believe I smiled back with an evil grin. 🙂

    Looking forward to your BIG news! 🙂

  15. Kyle and I once stripped my brother Trevor naked and tied him to a tree in the front yard. He was 13 at the time. Kyle and I then hopped in my car and left. He was found an hour later by my parents when they came home from work.

    Trevor said the worst part was NOT the cars driving by looking at him, but the fact that none of them stopped to help him.

  16. You crack me up! I tortured my older brother by being the biggest whiny tattle-tale on the face of the earth. And when he got in trouble, I'd peak around the corner and smile.

  17. you were awful to him!

    Can't wait to hear your BIG news!


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