Cheesy Pick-up Lines

 
 

First off, we have a winner for the Urban Translation Fun contest! This is the one with the most votes:

“I stroked the fake cookie duster I’d pressed on my upper lip and peeked at my subject from behind my copy of the shelf esteem runaway best-seller “Say Yes To The Mess” wondering if my giving him the book off had disguised the fact that I was investigating him for the murder of his wife.”

by: Erica Vetsch!  Thanks everyone for participating and voting! Everyone had great sentences! 

Now, on with the show this is it!

True story: A friend called. She’d been out at a few clubs, in Memphis. TN. Not Egypt. And a guy actually said to her: 

 

“You must be from Tennessee because you’re the only ten I see.” 

Silence hung on the line for a moment as I took it in. Finally, after a snort I said, “What did you say?”

 “I gave him the look and said, ‘Uh, yeah, we’re all from Tennessee. This is…Tennessee.’ And then I made myself scarce.”

After I laughed and made some of my own jokes, she finished telling me about her night and I hung up. I thought those lines were only used in silly movies. Someone really used that? And yes, this is going in a book. I’m telling you now.

So I looked up some really bad lines. Here are a few of my favorites:

 
“Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?”
 
“So, you’re a girl huh?”
 
“Good day for weather.”  (this makes me laugh every time!) 
 
“I’m sorry, were you talking to me? (No.) Well then, please start.”
 
“If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.”
 
“Do you know karate? Because your body is really kickin’.”
 
“Baby, if you were words on a page, you’d be what they call FINE PRINT!”
 
“Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?”
 
Okay, what I want you to do is pick one of these lines and respond to it!  I can’t wait to read the comments
 and crack up!